Baiowulf

Oh snap!!

Biggest Loser Tonight!

Ok, calm down folks. Tonight is another episode of the Biggest Loser and after last week I believe we are in for a surprise. Last week as many of you don't know (because I am the only one on this blog that watches the show) nobody was forced to leave the ranch. This week, two people will probably be sent home. I also predict there will be a temptation challenge. Temptation Challenges are where they try and trick or entice the ranchers into eating unhealthy. This usually results in a hill-to-the-arius montage of 300-pounders going balls crazy on cupcakes, donuts, 'tater chips, cokes, twinkies, ho-hos, goobers, hot dogs, nachos, dum-dums, snickers, three musketeers, apple-o's, whoppers, reeses pieces, cookies, pizza, lasagna, BBQ spare-ribs, apple pie, toblerone, and cotton candy. OMG I cant wait!!!


I plan on watching tonight's episode in the prone position while shoveling chili and beer into my mouth.

"WooHoo!!!!!! Temptation Challenge!!!!!"

Chili adventures

Yesterday (Sunday), I started to prepare a brand new chili recipe. This recipe calls for the use of real dried chilies and no chili powder. So I got some dried chilies (1 pound to be exact). The recipe calls for New Mexican chilies but the store only had a small amount of those, so I supplemented with anchos and red chilies. The latter of those two being incredibly hot.

I spent much of yesterday taking of the stems and removing the seeds of the small red chilies. I should have taken this as a sign. The New Mexican chilies were much larger, so there were less of them. Anyway I prepared the chili paste and tasted it. At first it has a great taste, then the heat hits you right in jingle bells. This stuff is going to be hot. Its going to be 9 alarm chili!

I decided to go ahead and make it because I'm not a wuss. So tonight I will finish the batch and let you all know how it comes out.

Thank you rich

Thanks for the tailgate game!! It was a huge hit!!!

Captain danger!!

Today when I got home I noticed the most scary sight in the world. But
did I shy away?? Hell nah!! I got the shovel and I scooped the dead
bird off the driveway and threw it in the woods.

Captain f-ing Danger, they call me.

Work buddy

I got a new buddy at work. His name Oscar and he is a stink-bug. I dare not squash him because

A) he is a buddy of mine, and

B) he will let out a stank odor and the people that sit around me would think that I ripped one. I couldn't live with the embarrassment.

GT vs UNC

On Saturday Georgia Tech will take on the mighty Tarheels of North Carolina. Last year we got whipped but this year will be different. How do I know it will be different? Easy, I have done extensive scouting of the two teams and I have come up with the two main reasons Tech will win.

1. Georgia Tech has better players
2. Georgia Tech has less women on the team (sorry ladies)


" Momma said knock you out!!"
-- Jonathan Dwyer

personal items

The last couple days at work I have noticed a disturbing trend. More and more personal items are being left in the men's bathroom. The first item I saw was a stack of papers (not toilet papers). A few days later I saw an umbrella (because all the rain OUTSIDE of the building). Earlier this week the items have regressed to a more interesting sort. On Tuesday I say a toothbrush and toothpaste, and just today I saw a half full (or half empty) can of RC Cola!

I understand people that brush their teeth at work, but I don't understand leaving the brush and paste for said teeth on the bench outside of the stalls. It could be worse, they could have left them on top of the rolls-o-tp.

A little message to the person responsible for the RC Cola: Where did you get that? I didn't think they sold RC cola any more. Why leave the half consumed drink in the bathroom? Did it taste like poo? I know it didn't because RC Cola tastes great.

Biggest Loser Power Rankings Week 2

Obviously the top two people on the Biggest Loser Ranch are Bob and Jillian. They are certified badasses who don't cry and don't moan and don't make excuses. Bob and Jillian are vengeful and they take no prisoners. Here are the rankings for the actual contestants.

1. Dan - He obviously has the most experience of anybody on the ranch. By experience I mean love handles. Those experience points are serious motivation for him to bust it and win this mf-er.

2. Rudy - Ex-football player who has it in him (i.e. tons of lbs) to lose weight each week. The only thing that can stop him are his loser (pun intended) ranch-mates.

3. Allen - I put Allen in the three spot because in all likelihood he has been thin before. He is a firefighter so I think, deep down, there is a somewhat athletic person inside of him. He does have really small ears, and its hard to believe in people with small ears, but for now he is a strong contender.

4. Amanda - She is quiet but I can tell she really wants to win. Once we get some more individual challenges we will know what she is made of. We already know she can compete because she was able to make this season's show in the finale of last season.

5. Sean - Probably one of my favorite rancheteers because he is 100% entertaining. The first week he didn't have a clue that he had type 2 Diabeetus which was a comedic gem. I think he has a legit shot to take the gold in this competition, but he needs to shed his "I love love love everybody attitude" and get down to kicking everybody's (including you Type 2 Diabeetus) ass.

6. Antoine - He's young, good looking (just ask Alexandra), and ready to do something to make him feel proud. Antoine, while not the most outgoing, could really shock the world and take the Biggest Loser by storm. The only think holding him back are his moobs. Srsly, those are intense.

7. Rebecca - She has already crowned herself the "pretty face" of the competition. I don't think her competitors will smiled upon that down the road. So far, and its early, she hasn't shown that desire to win.

8. Shay - She is the heaviest of all contestants which means she can, theoretically, lose the most weight. The only problem is she quit and talked back to the Trainers. Rule Number one of Biggest Loser: don't mess with the trainers because they will mess you up! Well she is talking a lot about other people and not worrying about herself, so I could see her making an early exit.

9. Abbey - The rancher with the most heart-wrenching sob story is probably not going to be the winner at the end of the season. I don't see a winner when she talks, she just doesn't seem super determined.

10. Julio - Kind of a doosh but I think he will be motivated after being in the bottom two the first week. He has "dead legs" and the ranch hands are already talking about how he is lazy......doesn't bode well for el julio.

11. Coach Mo - Talks a big game about being a coach and how he can motivate. He said, "if you let me, I will get in your head..." He meant, "if you let me, I will eat your keebler cookies..." Then he guilt tripped Julio like a champ. More talk like that and he will be moving up the power rankings.

12. Tracy - The partner of Coach Mo, who almost bought the farm in the first challenge of running a mile, is a long shot to win this contest. She decided to spend a week in the hospital instead of on the ranch supporting her teammate. When she gets back the ranch I think the ranchers will give her a week and not vote her out. But I have a feeling she will have another episode.

13. Danny - He cried in the gym because Bob made him workout...boo hoo hoo. Then he cried AGAIN before the challenge! Anyway, an attitude of defeat and baby tears wont get you to the finals. Suck it up. Oh and we don't need to see him strumming his guitar by the pool. We need to see him doing sit-ups and climbing stairs.

14. Liz - Jerry showed last year that older people can lose uber amounts of weight. However, she just seems so boring that I believe the ranchers will vote her off because they wont remember who the hell she is.

15. Dina- Who? Yeah she is a looooong shot to win this. She had a little mini-melt down early in week 2. Not a good sign. I don't think the rest of the contestants really care about her either. My only fear is that she will bring her partner Rudy down with her.

16. Alexandra - She got axed in the first week. Then she was all talking about how she has a crush on somebody at the Ranch, but she wont say who it is. Spoiler alert - It's Antoine!!

Flooding

Thanks to Mark for finding this picture that perfectly explains the flooding we are experiencing here in Atlanta.
For more great Kanye pics go here http://imaletyoufinish.com/

Rain Rain Go Away

It has not stop raining since last Sunday. And from looking at the forecast for the next ten days, it doesn't look like it will stop anytime soon. While this will help the water bill because I wont have to water the grass, it makes it very difficult to mow the lawn. So now the lawn looks a bit crappy because all the weeds are out growing the grass. It has reached a point where I have decided to get somebody to help with the lawn. We signed up for chemical lawn treatments to help get rid of the weeds and hopefully get a strong, thick, healthy lawn. I will keep everybody abreast of the situation as it unfolds.

I would like to get outside and play some golf as well, but that ain't happening with all the rain. I guess the rain will help me save some money, but I really want to keep practicing. Really, the main reason I want it to stop raining is so I can go to the Tech game next Saturday and not get soaked/sick. Keeping my fingers crossed.

It seems as if all of those prayers for rain last year are coming true all at once. Let's revise the prayer and pray for rain three times a week from 3am to 5am.

Land of the Lost

Recently, our backyard has turned into a crazy land of mystery and danger. All the rain and the fact that the pH of our lawn is out of whack has created an environment for prehistoric species to thrive. Note below the Super Mario sized mushrooms. These things are nearly the size of frisbees. And contrary to popular belief, they are NOT fun to hit with a golf club. Instead of going flying into the bushes, when smacked with a 7 iron, the mushrooms literally explode all over the place. This creates a nasty gooey mess that I have to clean off my club and often times my clothes. Obviously I have learned my lesson about this. But damn, it is so tempting!

This bad boy is what I call a jungle spider! Its prey includes grasshoppers, crickets, mosquitoes, one eye shiatsu (OMG watch out Tanka!!!11), and teenage mountain lions. I was able to get so close because I talked with the jungle spider. I was all like, "Hello, friend. Do you mind if I take some classy snap shots of your underbelly?" At first the spider, whose name is Salvador, was reluctant. "You know, normally I don't like to do those kinds of shots. I mean, I have friends that surf the net and all. I uh....just don't want anything out there I might regret." I was totally cool with this. I mean I really wouldn't want a bunch of pictures of my under tummy floating around the innernet. So I promised Salvador to make the pictures nice and something he could show is jungle spider mom.

Thanks, Salvador!

33-17 bad guys

Last night, Georgia Tech wet the bed. I mean it was an ugly game. After last year's dismantling of Miami we had to expect them to come out and give us their best shot. Well they did, they shot us right in the face. We got owned in every facet of the game, expect kick off returns. We did pretty good with kick off returns. But seriously, I have no idea why we couldn't put any pressure on their QB. The whole first half we rushed 2 and a half guys (Morgan = 1, rest of the line = .5/person). Why couldn't we bring in a linebacker or corner every now and then to make the QB uncomfortable. I don't know. I'm just second guessing. The coaches know a lot more about this than I do, so I can't bitch too much.

I need to not get so excited before these games. I get my self all worked up whether I think we are going to win or not, and when we don't its just a huge let down. What Tech has been lacking this season is the "I'm going to kill you until you die from it" mentality. It just seems like we play like wet dish rags for over half the game. I'm not going to be like the other apologists and say, "This loss is exactly what we needed." No, a loss sucks, but losing by one point or losing by 16 is all the same. So maybe we can take this embarrassment (which I thought letting clemson come back was embarrassing) and hopefully it can motivate us. Having over a week to rest up for UNC will be a welcome change from the last two weeks.

I have to hand it to Miami though, they spanked us. They spanked us hard and looked good doing it. But Miami still sucks, and their fans are total losers who wear jean shorts, slick back their hair, wear over sized jerseys to nice restaurant, smell like beans, and wear super white kswiss shoes to weddings. Complete d-bags.

Miami, come git you sumz

Trying to post from phone

Hello world!

"hello Robert! You look like a million bucks today!"

Thanks world! You're the best.

Strike two

http://omg.yahoo.com/blogs/a-line/kate-gosselins-wavy-new-do/265

one more and you're out.

no self control

OK, ignore what I said about The Biggest Loser. About 10 minutes after I posted last night the TV changed channels to NBC in order to record the show and I did nothing to stop it. I sat on the couch an watched the whole show, with commercials! I have no self control.

That was an incredible waist of time because TBL is the best show for DVR. Fast forwarding through the challenges and weigh-ins etc. But I just sat there like a blob and watched every second. That being said, it was a hell of an episode! This is the eighth season (I know this because all the contestants were chanting Season 8, Season 8), and as usual they got somebody even bigger than the biggest guy last year. I don't think its difficult for producers to find another American fatter than the next. You got a huge pool of contestants! Just drive through the middle of Georgia and walk into any Zaxby's and you will see.

I'll be brief though because not everybody has seen the show. In this episode, Jillian is out for blood which doesn't bode well for those at the ranch, but will be extra awesome for the viewers. In a couple weeks I will have picked who I want to win, and who I hate so stay tuned for my Biggest Loser Power Rankings.

Tuesday

Its about 7:45 on Tuesday night and I'm blogging. I'm sitting around the house watching tv and surfing the innuhnet. Let me just say this, there is NOTHING on tv on Tuesday. Well, I guess today that changes with the premier of The Biggest Loser (awesome show, expect some hard hitting posts throughout this season). But I'm not watching TBL tonight because I'm going to wait until Laura and I can watch it together. While watching TBL is fun as hell, watching it a second time is lame. Anyway, like I said there is slim pickens on the tube tonight. Mondays have Monday Night Football, Thursdays have Thursday night football (college), Friday I usually dont watch tv, Saturday has college football and Sunday has pro football. It's just those few days with nothing on that you have to make it through.

Please use the comments section to pass along your condolences or to make fun of me for being a tool. Either is welcome.

Party Recap

The party this weekend was excellent!! Tons of friends came and everyone had a great time. There was plenty of food, drink, and college football for all to enjoy. The morning of the party I mowed the lawn and even mowed a baseball diamond into the field. I'll get a picture of that later. The game of wiffle ball was insanely competitive and intense. The next day I had to pick up a nice pile of beer cans and beer bottles which was ok because both teams left them in a nice pile. People were also playing ladder ball which Richard and Christiane gave (Thanks!!!). The PTA punch was pretty good (there was none left over, so I'll take that as a sign). Thank you everybody for coming and making it a wonderful time!

Laura, Rachel and Alice.

People watching the late football games.

Thank you to Rachel and Kevin for bringing this awesome cookie cake!!! It didn't last too long.

Matt and Megan

Me gnashing on some cookie cake.

Katie and Hannah

J Bishy about to get all nasty on that meat pile.

RAOOAOAAOARRRARRR!!!!11!!!!

Pictures from Hilton Head

Pictures from GT vs. Clemson

Here are some pictures from the football game last thursday. We sat in the upeer deck north stands and had a great view. I would not mind sitting there again.

running on empty

After last nights epic I am running pretty ragged today. I got home around 12:30 and finally fell asleep around 1:30am. And since I am stupid, I insisted on getting up at my usual time of 5:30 to get to work early. Now I don't have to get to work early, I just do out of hobbit. I have a weird feeling that if I'm not one of the first people in the office, that I may miss something. However, at work, people usually don't talk to me until 10ish or the afternoon. So yeah, I haven't learned my lesson yet.

For all of you mathletes out there, you are correct, I am operating on 4 hours of sleep. Normally I get at least 7. This morning I ate a big ass bowl of Apple Jacks which oddly don't taste like apples, but that's not why I like them....Jeez, parents just don't understand.... I also pounded a large cup of coffee. Soon after the first, I downed a second cup of coffee. The second cup came from work so it tasted like butt. After the second cup, I was at a weird point in the day. My eyes and body were tired, but my hands were wide awake. My fingers were twitching and I couldn't hold them still. To paint the picture, imagine Gene Wilder's shooting hand in Blazing Saddles. If you haven't seen that movie, just know my fingers were going crazy.

Now my coffee buzz has worn off and I'm in the doldrums of the Friday afternoon. And tonight, I have my work cut out for me. I gotta run some errands and clean the house to prepare for the party tomorrow. All signs are pointing to a 30 minute power-nap when I get home. Good news is that the party doesn't start until 3pm on Saturday so I should be able to get a solid night of sleep.

On a different note, in fact this should be a new post all together, work coffee is sooooo bad! I don't understand why it has to be that way? There is a sign next to the maker saying, "don't bring your own coffee, some people don't like different types." Excuse me?!?! I cant find one person that likes this type. Ok, this is for the coffee drinkers. Let me take you through the tasting process of the infamous work coffee.

Close your eyes...Are the closed? Ok. You are picking up a non-descript Styrofoam cup. As you pick it up you shade to the right and see the chrome coffee pump. You grip your hand around the pump and slow press as this dark liquid rushes into your cup. You are sleepy and all you can think about is that delicious work oil your about to swallow thus lubricating your mind for the day ahead. As you bring it to your desk the steam gently lifts into the air and dissipates just like the smoke of a smoldering candle. You sit down and smell it, "Ahhhh this will hit the spot" you think. Then you slowly lift the cup to your lips and the first drops slide down your tongue. Can you taste it? Tastes good huh? Well now image that instead of coffee, you are drinking piping hot puree'd panda poo.


that's pretty much what I go through every other day.



go me

Thursday Night GT-30 Clemson Boarding School-27

Oooof!! That was much closer than it needed to be. But what a game. Going downtown on MARTA last night, I saw many orange-clad clemson fans so I was a little worried about the turn out. Once in the stadium however, it looked like a great showing for tech and almost everyone wearing white. A great atmosphere all in all.

To the game.
Tech came out of the gates running on all cylinders. Our first possession was an interception (lam3), but the first play of the second possession was a sweet run by Anthony Allen to take like 143 yards to the house! Clemson got the ball and was driving a bit until about the GT 40. They then faked a feild gaol and went with the pooch punt which Jerrard Terrant took 80 someodd yards for the score. At this time, all the clemson fans were sitting down looking like little peaceful orange crayons. Cooper Taylor then intercepted a pass, but our next drive kinda came to a stop around the 35. Then out of nowhere, we fake the field goal and our kicker throws a touchdown to BayBay Thomas. W00T1!!11 The first quarter of the game was s00per duper!! All we did was celebrate and give high fives and even high tens!!

The next two and a half quarters were boring. Clemson scored a bit, but pretty much our team wanted to watch the Steelers/Titans game so we took some time off. You know, it was the first NFL game of the season, so I can't blame our guys for taking a couple quarters off. So clemson akshully took a three point lead, which was cute, but it wasnt big enough. We finally got our offense rolling and scored two field goals to win the game.

Again, to get back to my original point, Clemsong sucks. Srsly, they are a worthless group of people. The only value they have is in bringing fun times to the GT fan base. Oh, and they are pretty good tractor repairmen. Gotta give credit where credit is due.

XOXOXO,
Cross

ClemsWN3D

Coach Kilmer words of wisdom

Today, we play Clemson...... Today! We beat Clemson!!11!

"I've brought two state titles!"

"Never show weakness, the only pain that matters is the pain you inflict!"

"You gotta be the dumbest smart kid I know."

Labor Day Weekend

Go America! I'm serious, yo. I love this country because it celebrates Labor by giving everybody a day off. Everybody except fast food employees, grocery store employees, gas stations, hotels, ..... well I guess by everybody I really mean Laura and I. So what did we do to celebrate the hardworking American spirit? We drove our foreign car to the beach, sat on our asses, went out to eat, shopped at the outlets (I didn't really shopped, I watched and checked college football scores on my phone.....USA), ate fast food, watched TV (MTV and football.....USA) and didn't work. Life was pretty sweet.

I didn't take a whole lot of pictures this weekend, but I will try a post a couple in the next few days. I was going to get up early and take some pictures of the beach before it got to bright outside, but I didn't wake up. Plus, I was going to get a polarizing filter for my camera to make those bright sunny pictures look a lot better, but I was lazy and forgot. Oh well, there will be another time.

We had a great time at the beach just relaxing. The weather was beautiful! We were also able to meet up with some of Laura's friends from school. We went out to dinner with Tony and Sharon who we had not seen since their wedding last August. It was a good time. We also played some mini-golf which I of course won, shooting 1 under par. It was a dominating performance. Laura and Sharon were the only ones with holes-in-one, of which Sharon got two. But it still wasn't enough to beat me. Sowwy :(

Weather

Last week Atlanta got a lot of rain. It rained all day for a couple days. And now the weather is cooler (low 80s) and sunny. The drastic changes in weather got me thinking about how it affects one's mindset. Let's break it down.

Rainy weather
I was sitting at my desk at work listening to the low roar of the heavy rain and occasional thunder clap. It just makes my mind race! All I can think about was sitting on my couch watching tv or a movie and drinking a col'beer or a hot cup of coffee. Then I opened my eyes and see my Outlook email.....bummer.

Sunny weather
At work I am completely insulated from the outdoors. But every now and then I get to see a window. Recently, it has been sunny outside and it just makes me think about playing backyard football, or golfing, or sitting outside drinking a col'beer. Then I open my eyes and I see my Outlook email....bummer.

Cold weather
Being in the office, you really dont know if its hot or cold outside. But when I look outside and I see the gray clouds and frost it gets me thinking. I start to dream about college football and sitting in the cold stand with all my buddies drinking a smuggled in col'beer. Then I open my eyes and I see my Outlook email...bummer.

Warm weather
Sitting at my desk looking at the previous night's baseball box scores and I know it's summer. I walk down the hall to the window and see the cars in the parking lot shining with the reflection from the summer sun. I think of throwing the baseball, playing some more golf, and sitting outside drinking a col'beer. Then I open my eyes and I see my Outlook email....bummer.


whoa....is it just weather patterns that make you think about not being at work?

Spray Tan Champ

Anybody watching "America's got Talent"? Just Laura and I? Ok, well here is what you missed a couple weeks ago. Let me set the scene. As I mentioned in a post a couple months ago, America's Got Talent is exactly what it sounds like, an over hyped talent show. It's entertaining and mindless to watch so naturally it just sucks me right in. Well there are three judges on America's Got Talent, Piers Morgan, Sharon Osbourne, and David Hasselhoff. Two of them are British. I know its crazy, but two of the three judges aren't American. And the third is practically German. Seriously, this show doesn't make a lot of sense.


All of the judges have something weird about them. Sharon Osbourne gets hypnotised by any act involving a dog. She literally gets all googly-eyed and starts praising the act as the best she's ever seen. Personally, any dog act should be relegated to Dog's Got Talent. Next there is David Hasselhoff who, in my opinion, is the Michael Scott of reality television. I don't know if the producers are telling him to make every comment some derivative of Hoff or its just him dooshing it up for the camera. For instance, here are some actually examples of his comments.

• Hofftastic
• Hoffpendous
• Hoffdiculous
• and of course Hoff-nuts

In addition to his hoffcrappy comments, he gets so worked up when a woman does a performance. It's like he's back in high school again and he thinks he's super cool and tries to talk smooth but it just comes out like this http://www.blogger.com/www.youtube.com/watch?v=QH3JAp7vMuo.

Finally, there is Piers Morgan who Laura insists on calling Niles. Not sure why, but that's what she calls him. He is pretty normal with his comments, but what is not normal is the absurdity of his spray tan! He looks like an Oompa-Loompa. Look at the difference between his face and his hand. It's like he went to the spray tan and insisted on wearing gloves. He looks like he loves carrots..... nam nam nam

Michael Vick

Vick has been a continual source of content for the radio stations across America. Not just sports talk radio, even mainstream pop and country music stations feel the need to talk about his situation. I personally don't care about the whole thing. I want to see him play again because he is fun to watch, and that's about it.

There are a lot of people out there that have strong opinions about him playing or not playing, and all of their reasons are the same. Those for him playing say, "He did his time, everybody has the right to earn a living." And those against him playing say, "He isn't a role model and the NFL should have standards..blah blah blah". You get the idea.

I understand both points of view, but what I don't understand is why everybody has to start their comments with, "First of all, I'm a dog lover. I have two dogs......" Who cares!? Does the fact that you are or aren't a dog lover or that you have so many dogs make your opinion any more valid? No, it doesn't. It's not like the people in their cars are listening to the radio saying, "Hey hey, quiet down a minute.....this caller is a dog lover, I want to hear what their opinion is." Or, "Man, I would really like to hear from somebody who actually owns a dog. Their thoughts are a lot more credible than some non-dog owner."

I should call up and say, "Hey. Yeah, this is Robert in a car....yeah, um thanks for taking my call, really love the show....First time caller, long time listener...About vick, you know, ummm I'm not a dog owner. I'm really a cat person, and I just feel that, you know, uhhh dog lovers and owners are gangin' up on Vick. And like I said, I'm not a dog owner. I really don't like dogs at all. I just think Vick's gettin a raw deal.....I'll hang up and listen."